Thursday, October 9, 2014


Passenger with "symptoms of Ebola" sends Birmingham firefighters to Birmingham-Shuttlesworth Airport in hazmat gear... via @aldotcom
 Sent at 4:17 PM on Thursday
 me:  Best comment so far: Benito82
I am going to the store to get milk and bread right now.
 me:  "AnonymousOne 4 minutes ago
James Spann says it's nothing to
 worry about. It'll just be a dusting."
me:  I feel like you and I are having very different conversations.

Friday, September 5, 2014

Revenge of the Closet Systems

A few months ago, b heard a crash in the middle of the night. Accustomed to hearing crying babies, I heard nothing. 

The next morning, I stumbled into our closet to find all of b's polos and pants sprawled on the floor. The closet organizer failed. 

We knew this could happen, or at least suspected as much when we moved in. When you shop for houses, you see what's there, like full pantries and organized closets. When you move into a house, you see what's left behind, namely dust bunnies and patched holes where the organizer had already torn from the drywall. Twice. 

So we weren't too shocked when it happened. We got it fixed and vowed to swap it out for a better system, or at least get this one into the studs. 

Imagine my not-so-huge surprise when we moved upstairs this week. I'd put my clothes in the guest room and cleaned out the closet in what would be our room for b's suits. 

Let's set the scene. It's about 11pm. We're hot and exhausted. B is just starting to move the first of his hanging clothes, namely two suits, when he hangs those hangers on the rack and, you guessed it, total failure. 

Being the fixer I am, I get b's suits downstairs to the closet below our basement steps. I hang them, even testing the racks before leaving them alone for the next 6-8 weeks. 

Tonight, b needed something from that closet. I hear him open the door and the language start flying. He came back upstairs and said, "well, that one collapsed too." I got up and told him is move them to the laundry room when he finally pointed out my lunacy and begged me to stop breaking the systems and simply lay his suit bags on the couch, which is where you'll find them now. 

We have three remaining systems. One full of baby clothes, one holding all my clothes and one supporting our entire wedding gift collection. I'm not hopeful, but I am sending my father in law to reinforce at least that last one ASAP. In the meantime I plan to continue my one-woman show explaining insanity and moving b's suits around from rod to rod. Wish me luck!

Thursday, September 4, 2014

What Shower?

Remember our bathroom?
This is it 8 hours later:
No biggie. I'll just be eating a tub of ice cream in the corner.

Oh, and good news. No new valve, and no more leak in the basement.

First Hiccup

Getting a "call me" text and missed call from your Project Manager is never ideal, but I like mine, so I thought maybe he was calling me to tell me that he was D.O.N.E. with the project and to come take a bath in my new tub.

Instead, sadly, he was calling to say that, when turning off the water to our master bath, the 40 year old value broke loose (something about balls or bearings or something) and, well, did what you would expect a water line might do when faced with a broken valve.

The good news? It's fixed and he's shop vac'ed out the water (insert slight panic here). Also, if B and I ever had a problem in that bathroom again (leaky sink, broken shower) in the middle of the night and had gone down to turn off this valve... well, let's just say that it wouldn't have been resolved and cleaned up within the hour. And that's just referring to the profanity we'd have to erase from O's memory.

Bump up the plumbing budget, it's Day 1!

Reno Debrief: Conversations with B

Me: I'm having a lot of trouble not going into the bathroom and salvaging all the old fixtures.

B: Um. Why? Why would you do that?

Me: To donate them.

B: The old, gold fixtures.

Me: Yes. (Sigh) I know.

One Hour

In one hour, my bathroom went from this:

To this:

I left at 8am and drove back by at 9. That's a lot of unnecessary wall, people.

And yes, my toddler was still sleeping. Wonder Baby.

Renovation Day 0: The Kitchen Before

Last night, B and I (with the help of Nana!) scurried around the house clearing kitchen counters and the space in the basement below the bathroom. Our Project Manager had been by earlier to ready the house, laying down protective flooring and installing zipper doors.

Now, let me tell you, I was NOT prepared for how choppy the house is. They made a tunnel from our master bath straight out the front door, which cuts the front doors off from us, unless we want to go into the dust zone via a zipper door.

There's another zipper door from the keeping room into the kitchen, so if you go into the kitchen door, you have access to the kitchen, the dining room, and the living room, but have to go through a zipper door to get into the keeping room, our bedrooms, or the basement. Alternatively, you can go into the keeping room doors, but then only have access to the upstairs bedrooms and basement. Still with me?

I say all that to say that it would've been easier to move things around before those doors went in. Picture me moving our bags of clothes to donate to the front yard for pick up. So the bags are in the front living room, but to get them out, I either have to take the out the back door, down the steps, around the driveway, to the front sidewalk, or lug them through two zipper doors (and around the entire first level) to get out the front door. Needless to say, taking out the trash, stashing the stand mixer, and even just remembering to get O's water cup have become true efforts that require a little forethought.

The great news is that O slept through our cleaning and prepping last night, and was still asleep this morning through the bathroom demo. Y'all, they gutted the bathroom and my 16 month old slept through it with nary a sound machine in sight. This kiddos is tired.

Here's a few before shots of our kitchen (and yes, my counters are always this clean. Why do you ask?):

I'm definitely ready for a change, and it's not that we're doing a huge one-- new counters, appliances, and backs splash, but I'm also a little sad. This is a very happy kitchen, one in which I've spent a million hours feeding that sweet baby and making dinners for B and myself. 

Once again? The good: This happy room will now have insulation! I've always whined that this kitchen felt way too hot. Well, now that the zipper doors have shut it and and dining room off from the rest of the house, there's a clear distinction in temperatures, and that's without even turning on the stove. They're adding insulation, which I hope will make a huge difference!