Confessions

Sooo, this post needs a longer back-story than I have time for. Long story short, I constantly lie when you wake me up. It's a combination of trying to pretend I wasn't asleep and my deep fall into dreamland, and it's generally humorous.

Of course, now that I have someone to document every moment of my random wakeups, these stories start to come out.

Pause there. Confession #2: I am constantly convinced my alarm isn't set. It's one of my few OCD compulsions but boy is it strong. B is perfect for me. How do I know? He checks my alarm every night, even after he's seen me check it three times in a row, convinced I've somehow shut it off during my "test checks."

This is, of course, problematic on nights when he's up late studying and I have to be trusted to set my alarm (and leave it alone!) by myself.

Confession #3: I hate bright lights when it's totally dark in a room. Ok, now we can move forward.

So last night, B comes into bed after I've been asleep for who knows how long and I hear myself think I'm asking this:

Me: B, can you check my alarm? I didn't want to put the bright light right in front of you, but I'm afraid it's not on.

Cool and collected, right? Sadly, B (and the universe) hears this:

Me (batting the night stand for my phone then holding it in front of his face with my other hand over it): Are your eyes ok?

B: What? They're fine. You're dreaming.

Me: It's bright! How are your eyes?

B: Oh, I get it. (pause) Yes, your alarm is set.

I literally fell asleep to the sound of him laughing himself to sleep. I'm so glad you love me this much, hon. God help us if you didn't!